The John Report: 2009 WWE Survivor Series Preview
I've always loved the Survivor Series PPV concept since it started over 20 years ago. The elimination matches are not usually the best matches ever, but they're fun just to see eight or ten guys in one match being eliminated one by one. I love the elimination style. I wish WWE did it for triple threats rather than the tired "first fall wins" rule that they've been using forever. Of course this is a PPV that features two triple threat matches for major titles, three Survivor Series elimination style matches and a singles grudge match. I like the card. I like the possibilities. Hopefully my predictions are accurate as to what will happen on Sunday night and if they're not then the booking team is insane. Nah, I'm just playing. It's hard to be accurate on WWE PPVs these days because they're inconsistent with their booking tendencies, so don't get on me too badly if I'm off.<!--more-->Team Morrison (John Morrison, Shelton Benjamin, Evan Bourne, Matt Hardy & Finlay) vs. Team Miz (The Miz, Jack Swagger, Sheamus, Drew McIntyre & Dolph Ziggler)The babyface side really only has John Morrison that actually wins matches on a regular basis. It's like Morrison plus the jobbers. The heel side has Miz, Swagger, McIntyre and of course Sheamus, all of whom are key figures in the WWE's future. Ziggler is too, but they have him lose so much in title matches that it makes you wonder. The heel side should win. It makes more sense. It would be foolish to have guys like Sheamus or McIntyre get pinned in a match like this. I guess I could see them get DQ'd for beating up somebody for too long, but that's a lame way to get out of booking a real finish. They should do something where four of the heels survive with Miz being the only one eliminated. He can brag about it on Raw that his team won and then they could have Swagger point out that his team won, but Miz lost to continue that rivalry. The right result is the heel side winning. The Pick: Team MizTeam Mickie (Mickie James, Eve, Kelly Kelly, Melina & Gail Kim) vs. Team Michelle (Michelle McCool, Jillian, Beth Phoenix, Layla & Alicia Fox)They have to book at least five falls in this one. That could be a problem especially considering how sloppy some of them are. I think it's stupid that Natalya's not in the match considering she is one the five best women in the ring in WWE (with Mickie, Michelle, Gail and Beth. Melina's a notch below.) I wouldn't be surprised if we got some kind of countout or DQ to take care of three or four of them at once. The main feud here is the one involving my beloved Mickie James-Canton and Michelle McTaker, so I think the right finish would be for MJC to score the pinfall. If the champion is in a non-title match it's usually a good bet that she'll lose a match. That's just how wrestling is. It should be noted that my favorite woman on Raw, Maryse, is due back any day now. It'll probably be Monday, though. The Pick: Team MickieTeam Kingston (Kofi Kingston, Mark Henry, MVP, Christian & R-Truth) vs. Team Orton (Randy Orton, William Regal, Ted Dibiase, Cody Rhodes & CM Punk)"One of these things is not like the others,One of these things just doesn't belong,Can you tell which thing is not like the othersBy the time I finish my song?"Yeah, I busted out a Sesame Street song in honor of Token…I mean Christian. Maybe it should be Bizarro Token? I don't know. Winner of best facial expression in that photo? William Regal. I wonder if he made the same face last year when he failed a drug test and his push after winning the 2008 King of the Ring was aborted? Cheap shot, I know. Couldn't resist. I think the babyface side is going to win this one because Kingston getting the upper hand on Orton is the right way for this to go heading into what is likely going to be a singles match next month. What's interesting is that we've read for months that Dibiase's "Marine 2" film is coming out in December and that he'd be going face because WWE likes to have their movie stars in the babyface role. Maybe it's not happening. Or maybe they'll use this match to kickstart it. They could do something where it's Orton and Ted against only Kofi, then the heels screw up, Kofi pins Randy. Orton can be yelling at Ted, which allows Kofi to KO him with the Trouble in Paradise for the win. That's just an idea. I could definitely see Orton's team winning too. For predictions sake, I'll go with the faces because I think the win would benefit Kofi more than anybody else in the match. The Pick: Team Kofi/Kobe Kingston/JohnsonBatista vs. Rey MysterioI would be surprised if this match is anything but a brutal beatdown victory by Batista. The strong rumor is that Mysterio's going to need knee surgery again and it could be as soon as next week. I can see him doing a stretcher job here. It will put over Batista huge as a heel monster while Mysterio's the perfect guy to sell a beating. What's interesting is that this PPV is in Batista's hometown of Washington. Are the fans going to cheer him even if he's a heel because it's his hometown? I think they might. It will be interesting to see how they book this one. As for the winner, I think Batista is the biggest sure thing on this card unless they want to push this feud another month. They already had Rey win fluke style in a singles match on Smackdown. It won't happen again. The Pick: BatistaWorld Heavyweight Title: The Undertaker (c) vs. Big Show vs. Chris JerichoThis one intrigues me due to the fact that Smackdown really doesn't have a lot of top babyfaces after Undertaker. Mysterio's likely going be out and I don't think they're ready to move John Morrison up the card. With Batista's heel turn in full effect I don't really see that many reasons why Chris Jericho or Big Show would win because to me all signs point to Undertaker vs. heel Batista. Of course, knowing that next month's PPV is a TLC themed one makes you wonder. Could you imagine Undertaker vs. Batista in a TLC? I think they'd both tear some muscles just climbing up a ladder. I could see a scenario next month where they do a four or six man TLC match, though. There are just so many possibilities about what might happen. Considering that WWE moves these belts around nearly every month it's hard to have a prediction you really believe in. Then you throw in Kane. What if his allegiance with Undertaker is all a ruse set up by Jericho? The heels cheat, Kane comes out for the save, but instead of the save he chokeslams Undertaker and helps Jericho win. That would work, wouldn't it? I feel like I'm going in circles. I'm going to pick Jericho to win because I think The Undertaker tapping him out on Smackdown last week was a sign that Jericho's getting the belt. Plus, I want him to win. When you really don't know, go with what you want. The Pick: Chris JerichoWWE Title: John Cena (c) vs. Triple H vs. Shawn MichaelsThis has been booked like a joke. It's a shame because the match will probably be really good due to the fact that Shawn Michaels is in it. He doesn't have bad matched. Even at 44 years old with bad knees and a bad back the guy always delivers. With that said, I don't think Shawn is going to win. It's between Cena and Hunter. I know on Tuesday in the Raw Deal I said I was picking Hunter. I changed my mind. The way it's been built makes me believe that the story coming out of this match will be that DX didn't care enough going in. That will cause friction and the eventual heel turn of HHH probably early next year at some point. I can see Cena vs. HHH happening for the title in singles next month (Trips in a TLC match?). They can say that he didn't get pinned while mentioning that he pinned Cena clean on Raw last month when Snoop hosted. I think Cena wins clean with the Attitude Adjustment probably on Michaels. Then again, picking a World champion to retain a title in a year where they move the belt around way too often? Am I drunk? No, not yet. The Pick: John CenaThat's all. It should be a good PPV. I don't know if there will be any match of the year type matches or anything, but it should have some solid in ring action. Plus, the Survivor Series really are a once in a year type of thing. That makes them stand out and it makes us remember them more. I can see the divas match getting maybe 10 minutes topes while the two male SS matches will get 15 minutes or more most likely. The two triple threat matches should get around 20 minutes while Batista/Rey should also get around that much time or even less. There's no need for anything to be rushed on this show. I like six matches on the card. Better than overdoing it with eight or nine.Remember to check out the blog located at johnreport.wordpress.com for some thoughts on TNA's PPV from this past weekend. I really haven't had time to add more, but I swear that when I do I will put more content up there. I'll see you on Saturday for a look at this week's Smackdown show in my Talking Smack column. I don't expect to write a Survivor Series column on Monday although I'll probably post some brief thoughts on my blog. I'll post more detailed thoughts in Tuesday's Raw Deal.Have a great weekend and enjoy Survivor Series.Smell ya later,John Canton - firstname.lastname@example.orgCheck out the blog at: johnreport.wordpress.com for new content updated on a daily basis.Add me on Facebook at Facebook.com/thejohnreport and Twitter at Twitter.com/johnreportVisit My Archives to view ten years of The John Report columns.